Lifetime of boat ownership doesn’t make it any cheaper

I kept telling myself this time it would be different. This time I would be totally happy with just the way things were.

I wouldn’t need to make any changes or additions. I wouldn’t be spending money on stuff I really didn’t need. I wouldn’t be spending money I didn’t have.

Did I listen to myself?

A little, maybe. Well, no, I guess I didn’t. Or at least I haven’t so far.

I have purchased boats before. In fact, I’ve now owned six boats at different times during my life, seven if you count the rubber raft I had in high school. And with the purchase of each boat has come an outpouring of money for items I deemed necessary to make the boat more usable, more comfortable, more fishy.

I have just purchased a new boat. OK, actually it’s a used boat, but it is new to me. And even though this boat has more bells and whistles than any I’ve owned before, I still seem to be spending way too much money to get it to where I think it is totally ready to fish.

In the first two weeks, I had already spent at least a week’s wages on downrigger balls, rod holders, rod holder mounts, fire extinguishers, first aid kits and a whole bunch of other stuff. Not to mention the new tow ball and ball mount I needed to help raise the tongue of the boat trailer high enough not to drag on the driveway when I backed it in.

Oh, and the giant wrench I bought to tighten the giant nut on the tow ball to make sure it wouldn’t come apart while we were speeding down the highway keeping my new boat from careening off into the pucker brush.

Which reminds me, I should be receiving a statement from the insurance company any day now with my “new” premium on my new boat. I’m not an expert on insuring things, but my guess is it will be slightly more expensive to insure a 2005 20-foot boat with a 150-horse motor than it is to insure a 1996 17-foot boat with a 90-horse motor.

The trailer for my new boat has electric brakes on it. The truck with which I intend to pull my new boat was not wired for brakes. It is now, another $150 later.

Of course, the state wanted a whole bunch of my money in sales taxes and license fees for the boat and trailer, a little expense I somehow had neglected to budget for. I had “x” amount of money to spend on a boat, and that, by golly, is what I spent — leaving little to nothing to spend on trivial items like tax and licenses.

You’d think I would have learned, because this is pretty much what happened when I purchased my last boat some 14 years ago.

Luckily, I kept a bunch of the stuff from my old boat — life jackets, ropes, bumpers, anchors and other miscellaneous nautical gear. What I didn’t keep from my old boat was the electric downriggers and the depth finder, and those didn’t come with the new boat. So those items, which in my book are pretty necessary for fishing, will needed to be obtained.

Will that be cash or charge, Mr. Phillips?

Someone once described a boat as being a hole in the water you dumped money into. I’m starting to understand the impetus for such an adage.

I have to tell you, though, all those worries about all the money spent went away quickly as I jumped into my newest boat last weekend and put it through the rigors of a couple of days of fishing. Man, was it comfortable. And we actually caught a few fish. Sometimes you worry a new boat might be hexed or vexed, putting off some unseen fish repellent.

Thankfully, my new boat seems to be just fine in the fish-catching category. That’s a good thing — because I don’t think I could go through the boat-buying and boat-accessorizing process again any time soon. I know my bank account couldn’t.

You never know, though. Next time might be different.

Or, at least, that’s what I would tell myself.

• Rob Phillips is a freelance outdoor writer and partner in the advertising firm of Smith, Phillips & DiPietro. He can be reached at rwphillips@spdadvertising.com.